Closeness Between Men and Women — A Woman Undergoing Psychiatric Treatment
Question
I am a 23-year-old fully Haredi woman,
normal, but struggling.
I am in a psychiatric ward for a period of two to three weeks.
The ward is secular and mixed; I have no choice. I do not live in the center of the country, and the places in the center, which are more religious, do not accept me.
My question is:
May I talk to, “be friends” with men here?
Because the truth is that I have kept very distant... but it is hard for me and I am alone.
Practically speaking, there are two young men who are pleasant to be with, and it helps pass the day.
Purely talking... nothing beyond that. And not intimate conversations.
I also do not want closeness from anyone, and I do not have any desires or urges. I am in a place of feeling dead inside.
So I am not concerned about that — about meaningful closeness. Also, when I leave here — that’s it; there will be no connection with anyone.
My question right now, during the present period, is whether it is permitted simply to talk and laugh with them occasionally....
Answer
Hello and blessings.
I understand very well the difficulty of such a situation, and the loneliness and boredom you are experiencing. However, the prohibition of closeness between a man and a woman not for the purpose of marriage applies always, in every place and in every state of health.
There is no allowance for a “friendly” relationship, even when it is clear that it will not develop into a longer or more serious relationship.
Even if you do not associate the chatting with desire or attraction, this connection is prohibited in and of itself. In addition, you are placing a stumbling block before the young men, who could certainly interpret the relationship differently from you.
Take care of yourself, recover quickly, and may you build a holy home for Hashem.
