Parashat Shlach
Question
A guten Erev Shabbos!
In this week’s Parsha, Parshas Shelach Lecha (5786 – according to the Eretz Yisrael reading) it says:
Bamidbar 13:22
“And they went up through the Negev, and he came to Chevron, where Achiman, Sheshai, and Talmai, the children of the giant were. And Chevron was built seven years before Tzoan in Mitzrayim.”
Rashi explains:
“‘And he came to Chevron’ - Kalev alone went there and was mishtate’ach on the Kivrei Avot, so that he should not be drawn after the counsel of the Meraglim.”
The Gemara in Mesechet Sotah 34b says:
“‘And they went up through the Negev, and he came to Chevron’ - it should have said ‘they came’! Rava says that this teaches us that Kalev separated himself from the counsel of the Meraglim and went and was mishtate’ach on the Kivrei Avot. He said: ‘My fathers, beg mercy for me that I should be saved from the counsel of the Meraglim.’”
The Question
It is brought in Halacha that when a person goes to daven at Kivrei Tzaddikim, one should not daven to the niftar himself, rather one should daven to Hashem in the zechut of the tzaddik who is buried there, as the Mishnah Berurah writes:
Mishnah Berurah Siman 581:
“A cemetery is the resting place of tzaddikim, and tefillah is accepted there more readily. However, one should not direct his prayers toward the deceased themselves, rather he should ask Hashem to have mercy upon him in the merit of the tzaddikim who rest there...”
If so, how did Kalev ask the Avot directly, “Request mercy for me.” Isn't it forbidden to do so?
Answer
First of all, before explaining the nusach hatefillah of Kalev, let us reflect on what Kalev did. Going alone to Chevron was extremely dangerous, because that was where the Bnei Anak, the children of the giant, lived. Nevertheless, Kalev went there in order to daven to be saved from the counsel of the Meraglim.
From here we see the greatness of Kalev’s Yirat Shamayim, that he was more afraid of sinning chas veshalom than from the physical danger of the giants who were there.
As for the actual question, there is a machlokes haposkim in this matter, and be’ezrat Hashem we will explain the different opinions.
The Maharil writes that it is forbidden to daven to the deceased themselves. Rather, the reason people go to Kivrei Tzaddikim is because the kever of a tzaddik is a holy place, and tefillos are accepted there more readily in the merit of the tzaddik.
The Maharil writes:
“Since a cemetery is the resting place of tzaddikim, therefore it is a holy and pure place, and tefillah is accepted there more readily upon this Makom Kadosh. One who is mishtate’ach on the graves of tzaddikim and davens should not direct his intentions toward the deceased lying there, rather he should ask Hashem to have mercy upon him in the merit of the tzaddikim resting there.”
The Maharam Schick (Teshuvah 293) asks that, according to this, how could the Gemara say that Kalev spoke directly to the Avot? He answers in two ways:
1. We have a rule that we do not learn halachah from Aggadah.
2. It could be that the wording is not literal, and Kalev did not actually speak to the Avot themselves, rather he davened to Hashem that in the merit of the Avot he should be saved from the counsel of the Meraglim.
This is also how the Mishnah Berurah rules, as quoted above:
“Rather he should ask Hashem to have mercy upon him in the merit of the tzaddikim who rest in there.”
However, there are Poskim who hold that although it is forbidden to ask the niftar himself to save him, nevertheless it is permitted to ask that the tzaddik be a meilitz yosher for him before Hashem.
And this is what we find in the Pri Megadim, that after bringing the opinion of Maharil, he writes:
“In the siddur Maaneh Lashon (whose nusach originates from Ari z”l) there are tefillos recited at the graves, and it somewhat implies that we ask the neshamah to advocate favorably on our behalf.”
The Maharam Schick in Teshuvah 293 explains the Pri Megadim in two ways:
1. This is not considered “Doresh el Hameisim,” because one is addressing the soul and spirit, of the niftar, not the physical being, as explained in Yoreh Deah 179, especially regarding righteous people, since “the righteous are considered alive even after their passing.”
2. The intention is not that one davens to the tzaddik himself, rather that the tzaddik would share in the pain of the person who is davening, and through their zechut Hashem will have mercy upon him.
This is a quote of the Maharam Schick:
“One who davens at the graves of tzaddikim that they should daven on our behalf is not giving them authority. Rather, he is informing them of his pain so that they should feel his suffering, and through their pain he will receive a yeshuah, because in their merit Hashem will have mercy. Therefore, we have no basis to forbid such a tefillah.
…Nevertheless, the Poskim argue in this matter. The Maharil, Levush and those who follow their opinion hold that the tefillah must be directed toward Hashem, and in the merit of this emunah, and in the merit of this belief in the eternal existence of the soul, and in reward and punishment, Hashem will accept his tefillah.. However, the Sefer Chassidim and the Zohar, and based on them the nusach of Maaneh Lashon was established, hold that the tefillah is that the tzaddikim should be meilitz yosher for us and on our behalf.”
Halachah Lemaaseh – In Practice
Morenu Hagaon Harav Amrom Fried shlit”a writes that when a person goes to a cemetery to daven, he should daven to Hashem in the zechut of the niftar buried there, and not to the niftar himself, as explained in the Mishnah Berurah above.
Morenu Harav Fried shlit”a also writes that the most favorable times to daven at Kivrei Tzaddikim are:
• Erev Rosh Chodesh
• The fifteenth of the month
• Erev Rosh Hashanah
• Erev Yom Kippur
• The Yahrtzeit of the tzaddik
On behalf of the entire Sheilot staff we wish you a Shabbos Shulem umevorach.
