The Motzaei Shabbos Bentching Question Everyone Asks
Question
Hi,
We are planning a big Seudah Shlishis this coming Shabbos, and since Shabbos is Erev Rosh Chodesh Sivan, I would like to know what should be done regarding Birkat Hamazon.
If the seudah continues into the night, should we say “Retzei,” or do we need to say “Ya’aleh VeYavo,” since it would already be Rosh Chodesh?
I would appreciate some guidance on this matter.
Answer
Thank you for your question.
Yes, this is a very common and practical question that comes up often when Seudah Shlishis extends into Motzaei Shabbos which is also Rosh Chodesh.
As you mentioned, the question is: what should one say in Birkat Hamazon?
Should one say “Retzei,” because the meal began on Shabbos?
Or “Ya’aleh VeYavo,” because Birkat Hamazon is being recited on Motzaei Shabbos, which is already Rosh Chodesh?
Or perhaps both?
I would like to share with you the psak of HaGaon Harav Fried shlit”a on this subject:
The best solution every Erev Rosh Chodesh that falls on Motzaei Shabbos is as follows:
One should eat a kezayis of bread before shkiah. After shkiah, one may continue the meal and eat whatever they want, including fish, salads, and even mezonos, but should refrain from eating a kezayis of bread after shkiah.
In this case, when Birkat Hamazon is recited later on Motzaei Shabbos, one says only “Retzei VeHachalitzeinu,” and does not say “Ya’aleh VeYavo.”
The same applies if one mistakenly ate a kezayis of bread during shkiah, meaning during the forty minutes between shkiah and nightfall. In such a case as well, one should say only “Retzei VeHachalitzeinu” and not “Ya’aleh VeYavo.”
However, if one ate a kezayis of bread after nightfall, meaning after the forty minutes of shkiah, then there are different customs regarding what to recite in Birkat Hamazon:
1. The Mishnah Berurah holds that one should say only “Ya’aleh VeYavo.”
2. Bnei Edot HaMizrach have the custom that one should say only “Retzei.”
3. Many Chassidic communities follow the opinion of the Shulchan Aruch HaRav to say both “Retzei” and “Ya’aleh VeYavo.”
The source of this halacha and the explanation is brought in the Mishnah Berurah as follows:
The Mishnah Berurah on Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim, Hilchos B’tzias HaPas, Seudah, and Birkat Hamazon, Siman 188 10: (loose translation)
Since we decide what to say based on when the meal srated, therefore if Rosh Chodesh falls on Motzaei Shabbos, one should mention only ‘Retzei’ in Birkat Hamazon and not Ya’aleh VeYavo’. This applies specifically when the meal was completed while it was still day.
However, if one ate bread at night as well, then there is an obligation to mention Rosh Chodesh too, and it is impossible to mention both, since that would be contradictory. How can one say ‘Yom HaShabbos Hazheh’ and afterward say ‘Yom Rosh Chodesh Hazheh’ which would imply that it's already Sunday?
Therefore, it is preferable to mention Rosh Chodesh, because that obligation is accepted by all opinions, unlike the mention of Shabbos, where there is a dispute among the Rishonim whether one is obligated at all to mention Shabbos when bentching on Motzaei Shabbos.
This is the opinion of the Magen Avraham and many other Acharonim.
However, some disagree and hold that if Yom Tov or Rosh Chodesh falls on Motzaei Shabbos, one should say both “Retzei” and “Ya’aleh VeYavo,” because we follow both the beginning of the meal and the time when Birkat Hamazon is actually being recited. We are not concerned that it may seem a contradiction, since the obligation to say “Retzei” began when the meal started during Shabbos, and afterward, when the meal continued into Rosh Chodesh then this second part of the meal creates an additional obligation to mention Rosh Chodesh.”
In practice:
Based on the above, the best is to eat a kezayis of bread before shkiah, and after shkiah to continue the meal without eating more bread. Then the halacha is straightforward: in Birkat Hamazon one says only “Retzei VeHachalitzeinu” according to all opinions.
Wishing you a Chodesh tov umevorach.
