Can You Visit the Cemetery on Erev Shabbos? Yahrtzeit on Friday and Traveling After Chatzos

Hi, this year my father’s yahrtzeit falls on Friday. May I go to the beis hakvarot on erev Shabbos, and may I go even after after chatzos? I would also like to know what about travelling to the beis hakvarot on Erev Shabbos since I was told one may not travel after Chatsot?

The answer:
One may go to the beis hakvarot on Friday, even after chatzos, and with regard to traveling on Erev Shabbos, please see below.

The answer explained in-depth:
One may go to the beis hakvarot even after chatzos. Although it is a time when we do not say Tachanun, it is no different from other times when we do not say Tachanun and are still allowed to go to the beis hakvarot (except for Rosh Chodesh). (On erev Shabbos, we do not say Tachanun only after chatzos, and before chatzos we do say it, so there is even more reason to allow it.)

HaGaon HaRav Fried shlita writes in Azamra Lishmocho, issue 346, that we find in the sifrei Kabbalah that the soul of the departed is not present at the grave on Shabbos, Yomim Tovim, and Rosh Chodesh. This is brought in Shaar HaYichudim, perek 4, os 5; Shaar HaGilgulim, hakdamah 38, os 3; see also Or Tzadikim, perek 10, and the Zohar, vol. 3, p. 173. At these times the soul ascends to Gan Eden HaAretz and is therefore not present at the makom hakevurah.

We see from the above that this is written only about Shabbos itself. We do not find a source stating that the soul is not present even on erev Shabbos, since the neshamos of the tzaddikim ascend from the kever to Gan Eden only when Shabbos enters.

With regard to traveling on erev Shabbos:

It is written in the Gemara, tractate Sukkah, daf 44, that one may not travel on erev Shabbos more than three parsaos (which is around 12 km), since one should be busy preparing for Shabbos.

This halacha is brought in the Shulchan Aruch as follows:

שולחן ערוך אורח חיים הלכות שבת סימן רמט סעיף א
 אין הולכים בערב שבת יותר מג' פרסאות, כדי שיגיע לביתו בעוד היום גדול ויוכל להכין צרכי סעודה לשבת,

Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim, Hilchos Shabbos, siman 249, seif 1:
 One should not travel on erev Shabbos more than three parsaos, so that he arrives home while there is still plenty time and can prepare the needs of the Shabbos meal.

Therefore, in a case where one has already made all the necessary preparations, or what he needs for Shabbos is easily accessible, then this halacha does not apply to him.

Therefore, nowadays it is permitted to travel even to a distant place. However, Hagaon Harav Fried Shelita writes (Azamroh Lishmech ibid) one should plan his trip so that he would arrive at his destination one hour before Shabbos, and since there is often traffic on the roads on erev Shabbos, it is best to leave double the time the trip would generally take on a Friday.

In a case that one takes a driver:

If the driver is Jewish, then one must leave enough time for him to be able to return home, since it is forbidden to hire a Jewish driver close to Shabbos when you know there will not be enough time for him to return home before Shabbos. However, if the driver is a non-Jew, it would be permitted.

 I would like to end with the words of the Mishneh berurah:

Mishnah Berurah on Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim, Hilchos Shabbos, Siman 249, Se’if 1

In these countries, most people prepare their Shabbos needs generously, and therefore people are not careful about this at all, whether when going to their own home or when going to be guests in the homes of others [Magen Avraham, citing the Agudah].

However, I have seen many Acharonim write that even so, one should be careful le’chatchilah not to walk or travel until close to evening. This is because people often stumble through this and come to desecrate Shabbos. A host, or even one’s own household, when one arrives close to Shabbos, will cook more for him and thereby desecrate Shabbos. Also, it often happens that he does not reach his lodging or his home while it is still day, but only when it is already dark. And how much desecration of Shabbos there is in carrying (hotza’ah and hachnasah, carrying out and bringing in), in going out of the techum, and in the resting of his animal!

Therefore, a person should take all of this to heart and hasten to stop for Shabbos, even in a village, and not let the evil inclination entice him to say, “The day is still long, and the road is good.”

Wishing you well.

• Gemara, Maseches Sukkah, daf 44
• Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim, Hilchos Shabbos, Siman 249, Se’if 1
• Mishnah Berurah, Orach Chaim, Siman 249, Se’if 1
• HaGaon HaRav Fried shlita, Azamra Lishmocho, issue 346
• Shaar HaYichudim, perek 4, os 5
• Shaar HaGilgulim, hakdamah 38, os 3
• Or Tzadikim, perek 10
• Zohar, vol. 3, p. 173