Atonement for defamation
Question
Hello! Unfortunately I told some bad things about one of my classmates to about four girls (each one separately), and I do not remember exactly who they were. The girl left our seminary a long time ago and unfortunately, she also went off the path of Torah and mitzvot, so that it would be very difficult to locate her. Besides that, I wouldn’t have the courage to ask her for forgiveness for what I told about her. It would hurt her very badly to hear what I told about her. I should add that I’m not so sure that the girls that I spoke to still remember what I told them about that girl, and I don’t remember exactly who they were. What should I do? How can I repent for this? This story is really bothering me. Thank you very much
Answer
Dear …!
In the event that the request for forgiveness will offend the person you spoke about, it is forbidden to ask him for forgiveness.
If your friends do not remember about this, do not remind them and don’t bring up this story.
In your case, your must repent, and ask G-d that the story not cause harm to the person you spoke about.