Participation of a Mourner in Hanukkah or Purim Celebrations
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Question
Can a mourner participate in a Hanukkah or Purim celebration, or any other event where music is played?
Answer
Regarding music, if one does not intend to listen and enjoy, even though he hears it, there is no prohibition. This is achieved by not joining in singing if they sing along with the music, and by not clapping hands to the rhythm of the singing, etc.
Regarding the Hanukkah celebration, if words of Torah or hymns and praises are said there, it is considered a mitzvah meal, and one may be there without eating. On Purim, it is permissible to initially listen to music. It is also permissible to eat there even according to the Ashkenazi custom of not eating outside the home for all 12 months, as stated in the Megillah 'family and family', meaning the meal will be in a gathering with (seed of truth).