Requested to Recite Kaddish for 12 Months
This question and answer were automatically translated using our trained AI and have not yet been reviewed by a qualified rabbi. Please treat this translation with caution.
go to original →
Question
If someone requested before their death that Kaddish be recited for them for 12 months instead of 11, should this request be honored?
Answer
One should honor the request and recite Kaddish for 12 months.
Source
The Rema in Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim, Siman 376, Sif 4 writes: "It is customary to recite Kaddish and pray only for 11 months, so as not to label one's father and mother as wicked, for the judgment of the wicked is 12 months." This implies that one should not disgrace their father, and since the father requested Kaddish for 12 months, it is his honor. If a father waives his honor, his honor is waived (and although the Rivash wrote about explicit disgrace of a father, as brought in Beit Yosef, Yoreh De'ah, Siman 334, and similarly wrote Keneset HaGedolah, Siman 240, nevertheless, this applies only to explicit disgrace when he is insulted and reviled. But here, where the disgrace is not so apparent, one may recite Kaddish).
Similarly, the Chatam Sofer requested his son, the Ktav Sofer, to recite Kaddish for him for 12 months, and so he did.
Comments

- Top halachic Q&A
- Practical festival halachot