Restrictions for a Mourner Regarding His Wife During the Shiva Days

Does a mourner need to observe the laws of separation from his wife?

A mourner, whether male or female, during the shiva days, does not need to observe the laws of separation if the wife is not in a state of niddah. However, they should not sleep in the same bed. Regarding hugging and kissing, Ashkenazim should be stringent. (For a groom or bride who has never consummated, seclusion is forbidden)

Talmud, Tractate Ketubot, page 4b: "And regarding mourning, it is taught: although it was said that a man is not allowed to force his wife to apply makeup or to arrange her hair, it was indeed said: she may pour him a cup, make his bed, and wash his face, hands, and feet." And we conclude that there is no difference between his mourning and her mourning. The early authorities disagreed regarding sleeping in the same bed, and practically, the Shulchan Aruch, Siman 383, paragraph 1, wrote: "A mourner is forbidden to engage in marital relations, but other forms of closeness are permitted, even pouring a cup, making the bed, and washing his face, hands, and feet, both in his mourning and in her mourning." The Rema added: "But in hugging and kissing, one should be stringent." It is permitted to eat with him from the same bowl. It is permitted to sleep with him, he in his clothes, she in hers; however, due to "go, go, we say to the Nazirite," one should be stringent and not sleep (with her) in the same bed at all. Regarding hugging and kissing, Rabbi Akiva Eiger in Yoreh brought a source for this, and his words are: "I saw printed in the name of the Gaon, Rabbi Zalman of Vilna, z"l, that this is explicitly stated in the Targum of Kohelet: 'A time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to embrace a wife and a time to refrain from embracing during the seven days of mourning.'"