Wedding Rings

When Did Rings Begin Being Used At Weddings? Must it be a Gold Ring?

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It is clear that the use of a ring in Jewish wedding ceremonies was already widespread in Talmudic times. (1) In fact, it might just be that a ring was used in biblical times, as well.(2)

It is worth mentioning that it is critical that the ring used for the wedding ceremony belong exclusively to the groom and no one else. (3) A groom who uses a stolen ring for the wedding, and perhaps even a ring that is not fully paid for, might render the entire ceremony null and void.(4) It is questionable whether a borrowed ring may be used for this purpose.(5) All authorities agree that the marriage is invalid if a ring borrowed from a non-Jew was used, although if it happened a rabbi should be consulted. (6) The bride is not permitted to give the groom a ring under the chuppah which is unfortunately somewhat prevalent today in non-orthodox wedding ceremonies. This is considered to be following in the ways of the Gentiles, and in addition, can call the entire ceremony into question. In Judaism, the groom takes the bride as a wife, and not the reverse. Confusion in this area can render the entire ceremony to be invalid

It is virtually a universal custom to specifically use a gold ring for the wedding ceremony. (7) Among the reasons for this is that gold is one the most important and valuable metals in the world. This is intended to remind a man how much he should value his wife. The ring should be made entirely of solid gold and not merely be gold-plated.(8) Nevertheless, in some communities, a silver ring is used, as silver is said to represent mercy in kabbalistic literature.(9) Indeed, most wedding rings in the Talmudic era were likely silver ones.(10)

1. Tosfot, Kiddushin 9a s.v. v’hilchata.

2. Bereishit 38:17; Daat Zkeinim M’baalei Hatosfot, Bereishit 38:18. See also Nechemia 7:46.

3. EH 28:18; Be'er Heitev, EH 28:36; Aruch Hashulchan, EH 28:84.

4. EH 28:1.

5. EH 28:19; Chelkat Mechokek 28:33; Beit Shmuel 28:48; Terumat Hadeshen 210; Maharsham 1:29.

6. Meishiv Davar 2:34.

7. Mordechai, Kiddushin 488

8. Teshuvot Radbaz 467; Avnei Derech 2:65.

9. Levushei Mordechai 3:274; Ben Ish Chai, Shoftim 8

10. Yevamot 31b.