Dealing with the Prohibition of Touch
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Question
Hello Rabbi, I started dating, and the problem is that we started as a Haredi couple, and I don't understand how we are already not observing the prohibition of touch even though we are not officially engaged, and I don't know what to do with myself?
Answer
What you are describing is the way of the yetzer, it begins with a small breach of boundaries that anyone might stumble upon, and it convinces us not to be so heavy, it's just something small, it's okay. Then, when we suddenly realize the absurdity of having fallen there, it starts convincing us that we have no chance, and God forbid, we are sinning, and it tries to discourage us from returning to the Creator. On the other hand, our task is to constantly remind ourselves that for every fall there is repentance, and the main part of repentance is restoring boundaries according to Halacha. Also, consult a rabbi in a personal meeting to guide you on how to proceed in this specific case.
Source
Shabbat (105b), Niddah (13b).