Understanding the Bracha of “Baruch She’petrani” — When and Why It Is Recited

Hi, we are planning our son’s bar mitzvah, and I know there is a custom to say Baruch She’petrani. Can you explain what this bracha is about, and when it should be said, is it the Shabbos before or the Shabbos after the bar mitzvah? Also, why don’t we say it when a girl becomes bat mitzvah?

Thank you for your question.

The bracha should be said on the Shabbos after the bar mitzvah, when your son is called up for an aliyah. After he finishes, you should then recite it.

It is important to note that your son should have a regular aliyah and not maftir, since only having a regular aliyah shows that your son is a gadol, whereas maftir may be given even to a katan, and therefore it is not obvious that he is now a gadol.

If it is not possible to have a regular aliyah on Shabbos morning, then he can have an aliyah at Shabbos mincha, and you can recite it then.

This is based on the following Mishnah Berurah (but first I would like to bring the Shulchan Aruch):

שולחן ערוך אורח חיים הלכות ברכת הפירות סימן רכה

י"א מי שנעשה בנו בר מצוה, יברך: בא"י אמ"ה שפטרני מעונשו של זה (מהרי"ל בשם מרדכי ובר"ר פ' תולדות), וטוב לברך בלא שם ומלכות 

משנה ברורה על שולחן ערוך אורח חיים הלכות ברכת הפירות סימן רכה סעיף ב

(ו) בר מצוה - היינו כשנעשה בן י"ג ויום אחד ועכשיו נהגו שלא לברך עד שעה שהנער מתפלל בצבור בתורת ש"ץ או שהוא קורא בתורה בשבת ראשונה שאז נודע לרבים שהוא בר מצוה. 

One whose son becomes Bar Mitzvah should recite:
"Baruch Atah Hashem Elokeinu Melech ha’Olam shep’trani me’onsho shel zeh"
(Maharil in the name of the Mordechai and Bereishis Rabbah, Parashas Toldos).
It is proper to say this blessing without Shem U’Malchus (i.e., without mentioning Hashem’s Name and Kingship).

Mishnah Berurah on Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim 225:2

Bar Mitzvah: meaning when he becomes thirteen years and one day old.
Nowadays, the custom is not to recite the blessing immediately,
but rather at the time the boy first prays before the congregation as a Shaliach Tzibur or when he reads from the Torah on his first Shabbos, for then it becomes known to the Tzibbur that he is Bar Mitzvah.

The reason for saying Baruch shep’tarani

The reason is brough in the Mishnah Berurah in seif katan 8 as follows
 משנה ברורה על שולחן ערוך אורח חיים הלכות ברכת הפירות סימן רכה סעיף ב

(ז) שפטרני מענשו וכו' - פי' דעד עכשיו נענש האב כשחטא הבן בשביל שלא חנכו למצות התורה ועכשיו שנעשה איש מחוייב הוא להתחזק בעצמו למצות הש"י. ודע דאע"פ ששוב אין עליו ענין חינוך מ"מ יש על האב מצות הוכחה כשרואה שאינו מתנהג כשורה וכשאינו מוחה בידו נענש עליו דלא גרע משאר ישראל וכידוע מה שאחז"ל כל מי שיש לו למחות באנשי ביתו ואינו מוחה נתפס בעון אנשי ביתו. וכל מי שיש לו למחות באנשי עירו ואינו מוחה וכו':

Mishnah Berurah on Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim 225:2

“Who has exempted me from his punishment” —
This means that until now, the father would be held accountable if his son sinned,
for he had failed to educate him properly in the mitzvos of the Torah.
But now that the son has become a Gadol, he is personally obligated
to strengthen himself in fulfilling the Mitsvot of Hashem.

However, it is important to note that even though the father is no longer responsible for His son chinuch,
 he still bears the mitzvah of tochachah, to rebuke him when he sees his son behaving improperly.
If he does not protest, he is punished for his son’s wrongdoing,
for he is no different than any other Jew who must protest wrongdoing when he is able.

As Chazal teach:
 Anyone who has the ability to protest against the sins of the members of his household
 and fails to do so, is held accountable for their sins.
 And anyone who could have protested against the people of his city and did not 
 he too is held responsible, and so on.

So now that we are clear about the halachot and the reasons, when and why we recite the bracha, we need to understand why the minhag is not to say it for one’s daughter when she becomes bat mitzvah.

The Eishel Avraham (se’if katan 5) asks this question and writes that, based on the Magen Avraham (siman 343, se’if 6), a father is not obligated in the chinuch of his daughter; therefore, there is no reason to recite the bracha. However, le’halacha, the Mishnah Berurah (ibid., se’if katan 2) writes that the father is indeed obligated to be mechanech his daughter. Nevertheless, when she is young, the obligation is less binding, since she is exempt from mitzvot aseh she’hazman geramah, and she is also exempt from Talmud Torah. Therefore, in such a case, the father does not need to recite the bracha of Baruch she’petrani.

This is the quote of the Eshel Avraham
 פרי מגדים אשל אברהם על שולחן ערוך אורח חיים הלכות ברכת הפירות סימן רכה סעיף ב

והנה למה לא יברך בנקיבה י"ב שנים וב' שערות לפירוש הלבוש דבנים קטנים נענשים בשביל אב לא שנא זכרים ונקיבות, ולמאן דאמר חינוך י"ל דאין מחויב לחנך בתו קטנה עיין מ"א [סימן] (שמ"א) [שמג] [ס"ק] א', גם למאן דאמר מחויב אין בה כל כך מצות שמחויב לחנכה בקטנותה, 

Wishing you all the best.

1. Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim 225:2
2. Mishnah Berurah, Orach Chaim 225:2, s.k. 6–8
3. Maharil, cited in Mordechai
4. Magen Avraham, Orach Chaim 343:6
5. Eishel Avraham (Pri Megadim), Orach Chaim 225:2