A spinster on Chanukkah

I’m a sixty-year-old spinster, and it’s very difficult for me to light Chanukkah candles. This always reminds me that I don’t have a family. Am I allowed not to light, since this is a time-bound positive commandment?  

Women are obligated to light Chanukkah candles just as much as men are, since they were also involved in the same miracle. Therefore, the fact that this is a time-bound positive commandment does not constitute an exemption for women. The opposite is true: one of the central oppressive anti-Jewish decrees (jus primae noctis) was directed against maidens.

No-one knows what his role in life is. But one thing is very clear: no-one is here for nothing. Only when the day of reckoning comes, will we know why this specific path is what is best for us. In the meantime, you should let the light of Chanukkah into your home, and in the merit of your keeping this commandment, Isaiah’s prophesy will be fulfilled (56:5): “Even unto them will I give in My house and within My walls a monument and a memorial better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting memorial, that shall not be cut off.”

Shulchan Oruch, section Orach Chaim, chapter 675, §9; Mishnah Berurah, ibid., subsections 9-10, 14; Biur Halacha ibid.; Shulchan Oruch, section Orach Chaim, chapter 677, §2; Mishnah Berurah, ibid., subsection 13; Azamrah LiShmechah newsletter #118