Regret of Sin
Question
When it comes to Teshuva, does the fact that one may regret a sin due to the repercussions of the sin contradict Teshuva? For example, if one eats something non-kosher and gets physically sick, and thus regrets eating the item. Is this considered regret of sin? What if after eating the item the person does not get physically sick, but rather feels “spiritually “ ill, and does not like the feeling of spiritual ailment, is this considered regretting the sin, or perhaps regretting the sin?
Answer
Shalom!
Thank you for your question.
It is very impressive that you wish to repent and correct your mistakes. We respect this very much.
In Judaism, there is no such thing as G-d being angry forever. G-d does not want to punish you at all. G-d wants just wants a relationship with you…and it appears you are making these efforts!
We believe that all mankind who has sinned can be cleansed of their sin with prayer and “Teshuva”, meaning, repentance. Yes, even Teshuva out of fear or illness, whether physical or spiritual is still considered to be Teshuva. Indeed, the “spiritual illness” you refer to due o having eaten non-kosher foods is real and is known as "timtum halev", which means "to blemish" or "to confuse" the heart. The main casualty resulting from timtum halev is a weakening of one's spiritual sensitivity and enthusiasm.
We see this, in fact, in the very first chapters of the Torah, where it says that G-d said to Cain: "Why are you upset, and why has your countenance fallen? If you do good [i.e. repent and change your ways], it will be goo for you [that is, you will be forgiven]. But if you don’t do good, sin rests at the door..but you can overcome it!" (Genesis 4:6-7).
Anyone who confesses and regrets their sins and commits not to do such things again will be forgiven for all the wrong they have done. Our G-d is a loving and merciful G-d who wants a relationship with all of us.
Pray to G-d, confess to him the mistakes you made and resolve not to do such things again and you will be starting off fresh with G-d.
Best of luck!