Divorce: Wife Refuses Get

Hi I was married more than 20 years to a Jewish lady she left 5 years ago to be with another man I stayed with our children The problem is she will not devorce me she's out with other men and still she won't devorce me I have had lots of problems with offices be we arrived still married Can you please advise me or help me with this problem Thank you John morris

Shalom!

Thank you for your question.

I am sorry to hear of your difficult situations.

I am going to assume that both you and your wife are halachically Jewish.

According to Torah law, it is a man that both “marries” and “divorces.” In the case of divorce, it is the man who technically initiates the divorce by issuing his wife a “Get” document.

But of course, a woman is required to accept the Get in order for the divorce to be valid. She must also accept the Get willingly. In other words, a divorce would not be valid is a husband threw a Get into his wife’s hand in an act of surprise.

Your local rabbi and Beit Din will be happy to join you in your efforts to obtain a halachic divorce. Every city with a sizeable Jewish population has a Beit Din which is a rabbinical court comprised of thee rabbis specializing in specific areas of Jewish law, most notable, family law. The rabbis of a Beit Din are often called “dayanim” judges, as they also hear cases and render rulings on monetary and civil disputes. Every divorce must be overseen by a Beit Din as divorce happens to be one of the most complicated proceedings and rituals in Jewish law. One error, even if accidentally overlooked, can render the divorce invalid. Hence, extra expertise is required.

A rabbi and Beit Din will also make the effort to convince your wife to accept the Get and why doing so is in her interest, as well.

Reach out the them as soon as possible!

Best of luck to you!