Fulfilling the Obligation While Standing When the Blesser is Sitting
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Question
I am listening to Havdalah/Kiddush from someone who is standing. Do I need to stand as well? (Same question for sitting)
Answer
Shalom and blessings
In Kiddush: One should stand during 'Vayechulu', as it is testimony. Then sit during the continuation of Kiddush, as it fulfills the obligation for the listeners. He also needs to establish himself in the place of the meal.
In Havdalah: According to the Shulchan Aruch - both the one making Havdalah and the listeners should sit. According to the Rema - the one making Havdalah should stand. There is no strict rule if the listeners sit or stand.
Source
Shulchan Aruch, Siman 271, Sif 10, and Mishnah Berurah there.
Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim, Siman 296, Sif 6. Rema and Mishnah Berurah there.